Sometimes you just have to be a high ridin' beeyitch to survive because people are stupid. No they are, myself included it's not as if I have made the most winning choices in my life. (Though some things may not have not been so much stupidity but blindness and naivete) Still some people however are so incredibly dimwitted it's A wonder they made it to adulthood with all of their limbs still working. That being said as America continue's it's dumb down decline and even Gay Men and Straight Women are becoming as dumb as rocks (which is scary because everyone knows we are smarter than straight men), it's IMPORTANT to remember some basic ways of well getting people to stop doing dumb shit OR getting on your nerves with their dumb shit. Or better yet to keep YOU from doing something really stupid.

1. When faced with a dilemma that pertains to a love interest, who ur not sure you even really like ask yourself this question:
Is all this (fill in the blank) going to be worth it just to get with this person or should I just slap this high siddity muthafucka, kick rocks, and get something eat? And for real if he is not a dime and you have to ask yourself this question you should be slapped. Come on folkz ur better than that no one should be with someone who aggravates them continually that's stupid and a waste of precious time. Don't put urself in that position.

2. White Gay Men oftentimes in the club or bar think they have the right to grope you (meaning Gay Men of Color) especially when they're drunk. (I know this is a NW phenom). I suppose they think all the Black Men of Oregon and Washington State are snow queens and while many of them are even those brothas have a right to approached with some kinda class. SO next time a White man you don't know grabs your dick or touches you in some equally personal place reward him. Knock his eye from his socket.

3. To all you nasty exhibitionists at Gay Pride. Stop taking off your clothes. Straight people don' wanna see it and you know what neither do WE GAY FOLKZ. I mean going topless is fine if ur a dude or even some women I mean if you got it flaunt it. But hey how often is that the case. (Oh by the way the beach party and all pool parties and their participants get a pass on this) Also to some of my bigger gay brothas..And I could care less if you think I'm shallow. Some of you wear so little clothing you end up looking like beached WHALES JUST waiting to be harpooned. If you're really fat you know that muscle tees, tanks, coochie shorts, spnadex and the like make you look FUCKED UP AND GROSS YOU GODDAMN BELUGA SHAPED MUTHAFUCKA! Just cause they make it in your size does not mean you should wear it! So use common sense when dressing. Just because everyone at Pride, is half naked to naked doesn't mean you need to be. Nor does it mean ur impressing anyone. And you actually think we're smiling at you 'cause we think you're cute...

4. When People are speaking another language with each other, having a conversation that has nothing to do with or about you, and you don't speak their langauge but you feel the need to say some dumb shit like speak English DON'T! You look rude, uneducated, INSECURE MOST OF ALL and racist I swear if u interrupt a conversation I'm having in French or Creole to draw attention to the fact that you barely can speak Enlgish let alone another language yourself and display such childish idiocy towards me I'll cut your tongue out!

5. If you have HIV it probably is a bad idea to talk about others who have the syndrome, especially if they take care of themselves and don't help spread the infection by having unprotected sex with unwitting males like you do. I mean goodness your status changes daily and depending on who you're trying to get to plugg ur nasty ass! One day you're positive the next your negative! CUT DA SHIT! Stop lying to and then sleeping with everyone, STOP MALICIOUSLY ATTACKING PUBLICY PEOPLE WHO HAVE THE SAME THING THAT YOU DO! You know who you are quit doing that!

6. Black People keep SPANKING your children. And if you think I'm saying beat ur kids your stupid. Look it's just this simple children need discipline, they need limits. My man and I have been recently caring for Djevontae our 1 yr old cousin. He is sooo cute, so sweet, so beautiful, soo innocent and he is more precious to me than all the diamonds, and gems of this world. However he is will full, stubborn, and can be selfish and that is how he should be he's a baby. I as the adult in the situation am the one who must guide him and make sure he doesn't hurt himself or others with his actions or damage our living space when he is with us. So when he hits me, if I allow it I teach him to disrespect authority which could be damaging for him later so I give him a little pop! When he throws food on the floor after looking me dead in the eye and willfully disobeying what I have told him I give him a tap. When he throws a tantrum screaming as if he is being murdered (he just started this) I pick him up and leave him in the other bedroom and do not pay him attention until he stops. I have never hurt Bompah Lump that's his nickname but I let him know he has to have boundaries. Love does not let a child run wild. Love protects and cares for the child and that sometimes includes discipline. Look it's like this BLACK PEOPLE either you discipline your babies and children or they grow up and the police do it for you. And we all know they do not love us!

5. All People! Watch your children! How many times have you been out in the mall, the park, a restaurant anywhere that people congregate and some child, almost always 5 and under is walking or frolicking alone by themselves with no sign of their parents. That is incredibly stupid and it is so stupid THAT it enrages me. Mind you these same neglectful parents will be on the tele sobbing about how some pervert kidnapped their baby and please bring him back but if they'd been paying attention the child wouldn't have been nabbed at the first place! WATCH YOUR KIDS! KEEP TRACK OF YOUR KIDS! WE LIVE IN AGE OF PERVERTS, PSYCHOS, and WEIRDOS! WATCH AND PROTECT YOUR KIDS! Like a 4 yr old has any business away from his parents side?!

6. To all you people who let your doggs roam free in the park listen up! I have no issue with certain dogs being off the leash in the park if their master is responsible and the dog is well trained but some of you stupid foolz...! Some of you have these HELL HOUNDS ie PIT BULLS, ROTTWEILERS, DOBERMANS, MASTIFFS! And you let them run around, fangs bared, snarling and barking, without a MUZZLE OR A LEASH while the rest of us and our babies run and scream in terror of our lives! Stop doing that shit put ur fucking dog on a leash! You people who have these HELL HOUNDS that do this always act like your shocked when they go on their 'when animals attack' rampage talking about:
"Fluffy NO! Comeback don't rip that woman's throat out and then feast on her entrails!" You people are stupid and your dogs should be destroyed and then because you let your murderous HELL HOUNDS run free you should be too!

7. Do not be rude to customer service people if they are not rude to you. They work hard for not so much money talking to customers who are usually very stupid or at least act as if they haven't got a clue. Then here you come raging about your cell phone bill or bank statement which is usually your fault that it's in the state it's in and you expect them to bend over backwards to help you. Here's hint be kind and gracious and you will get just about whatever you want, be an ass and get what you get which is usually nothing. I mean don't you understand when you ask for the supervisor after you just cussed out the underling that the supervisor will care more what they have to say about you then what you have to say about your situation. Being rude to customer service reps first is stupid STOP DOING IT!

Okay I'se done. Follow these simple rules and you will avoid the dumbing down of America. Au revoir pou maintenant mes zamis. Goodbye for now friends...