Thursday, July 15, 2010

I have returned to Seattle this afternoon to what I have returned I don't know. I went to Portland to see my ex Goldie and while I was there my Aunt Renee died, I ended up having a nervous breakdown, was taken advantage of by my ex and finazlly left to return to Seattle with no home. I feel suicidal and honestly I am thinking of just offing myself. Life, lving this rat race is making me tired. My step father told me not to come back but all of my things and my life is here andI could not bear to stay in Portland any longer and that place ws killing me again. Perhaps I should have stayed and let my ex drain me to death. Still now that I am here I ahve to fight to survive. The spark of life is not yet extinguished andI can do it but who really knows. On the other hand if I were to die who would care? I mean really what is so speacial about me? I am not even sure if I ever touch anyone around me anymore and I feel so depressed and so expendable. Oh my Lord I really do feel as if I want to die. I do not have the strength for this anymore. I do not have the strength. Aie mon Grand Met...I do not haveth strength.

2 comments:

Jomo said...

Kyon - this is Jomo. I know your feelings can be overwhelming...but the truth is you have family who loves you. We are ready to stand with you if you will stand for yourself.

best,
Jomo

rebecca said...

hi kyon:
we love you and are praying for you. i told you how much you touched me when you sang at grandma's home going...he hears you now...it is in our darkest moments that his light shines.

love,
rebecca


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Wassup Folkz this is me Kyon Saucier also known as Mr Kyon on A4A or Creole Elf on BGC.... Aww come on now like none of y'all are ever on those sites, yeah you are 'cause I've seen you... LOL!

Enter my world for a second... What? Huh? Well yes there are Black People in the NW and yes we have a vibrant culture up here. I mean naw Seattle aint Atlanta or NYC or DC or Chicago or any other city with a huge Black Population, but it's my home and there are few places as beautiful... Not too mention in all of the NW Seattle and Tacoma have the highest Black Population. So come on enter the world of Kyon....Yon Yon Yon.... Sigh. I was trying to make an echo sound. Now look I I know I got some typos and things so be patient with me folkz.... Cause I get excited when I write... Okay there is no excuse 'cept that it's my page I do what I want! *smile*


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Yeah when I was younger I could've been considered a geek. Always my eyes fixed upon a world none could see. Always seeking to escape from the mundane things of this life.

But a geek I think of as dreamer, someone one who delights in things outside of the ordinary.

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