Did you hear this shit. Dumb bitch. Of course thing again nothing changes...
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
I want to feel no pain yet they say that when you feel pain you know that you are living. For w/o pain how could I or anyone else value trully value the joy. So for now I can deal with the pain. Still Sade has always been comforting to my soul in times like this.
Monday, October 27, 2008
However I know that in time all wounds will heal and while I do really know how it feels to be stressed out I will make this thing work out eventually. All will be well in time...
This songs says how I feel now...It was a long time comin' but still it hurts you know.. It hurts me. Because I do still love him. I still do love Trumph. But I know this is for the best. Or at least that is what I am telling myself. God still it feels like part of me has been ripped away.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
If you want to see reactions and all to this video you can vist you tube and don't forget to visit my you tube page guyz! LUV U ALL!!!
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Hey guyz this blog post is composedo ver the last 2 days so enjoy I am back!
SAK PASSE!!!! Bonjou mes zamis, ouais, oauis me konne longtemps non me voir huh? Bien j’ai retourne a vous mes zamis as you always knew that I would. Aie sicre Marie, Joseph et Jesu au ciel what I times and adventures and all around craziness have I had since I‘ve been gone from all of you in blogland. Where to being, what shall I tell you all? Well I suppose I should begin with the most pertinent things.
I am now 31 as of 10/10/08, I had a lovely 3 day holiday from work in honor of my birthday. Most of the holiday I hung with my good friend, (who is most handsome and gracious) Javiav. We mostly hung out, watching movies, eating, drinking, and having really good discussions. I spent the early of hours of my birthday infact nursing Javiav through a bout of drunkenness which was fine with me, better he had stayed with me while Trumph was out giggin’ then finding out he had been harmed driving drunk later on.
The next day was a little party and dinner with my sister in law Tiffanska et compagnie which was nice. I got some presents, a little cash, a book the Boleyn Inheritance which is amazing, a pack of cigarettes, Robin Thicke’s new CD which is lovely, and then I had to work the next day because those fools above have changed my schedule again. This is a more than rotten piece of luck because I simply despise with a passion, working on the weekends.
How do I feel being 31? No different at all. I have good health; I’m VIH negative, I feel as I did when I was 30. And apparently according to my friend Carolina my skin has taken on a healthy glow that is making me look luminous which is da shit, ‘cause I mean who doesn’t want to look more handsome or beautiful? I know I do and apparently so I am. Whew okay well that is out of the way.
Trumph and I
We are having some issues. Trumph has finally gotten a job and is acting more the part of the man I desire him to be…Finally…However he is still Trumph and he hurt in the time we were gone with what I thought was blatant selfishness and utter self regard which did not at all regard or give two shakes of shit and damn about me! It had to do with us moving and his lack of being on top of things that almost made us both homeless… Pardon me made me almost homeless he had a place to go and when I asked him of my fate he almost coldly asked didn’t I have friends. Don’t you know folks Kyon? The utter insolence and insult of such a statement! I still feel a stirring and fire in blood that heats my skin feverish hot and burns within my chest like vitriolic fire! How dare he even consider!?? I am his man, I am a damn good man, all faults aside and for him to suddenly be getting his shit together, and then to attempt to cast me to the side in such a way. I cried later on over it, not out of hopelessness I am employed and resourceful and I do have friends so I would never be homeless again… But the hurt which it caused me (All the support at least financially among other things he does not owe me shit but still how dare HE?)….I still love him but something in me has broken just a bit. He broke my heart.
However we are alright for now though I believe it may b best for us to live apart. Not to terminate the relationship but perhaps time apart would be good for us. I am not willing to cast him aside so easily though things sometimes with him are not easy. He is not a bad or evil man, he has never hit me, has never really even called me out my name, nor is he malicious or cruel, and he is forgiving. He is learning and growing and I have been patient and some of that patience is paying off…A good man is hard to find so there you go. Though between you and I, there are those who would take me if I found myself unattached. But you and I both know that what is new is not always better. I’ve learned that lesson the hard way. So we are on shaky ground but I will still hold tight to him for now.
So I have been getting some good music lately. And I wish to do my own little reviews. So Jennifer Hudson’s new CD y’all heard it. I love her voice but not all of the songs. Pocket Book, Spotlight, and My Man Loves me, My Heart, and I Can’t Stop the Rain are all good but on a whole the CD seems lack luster. I expected more and it is just okay… It aint her fault though she simply is too good of a singer and some of these folks don’t know how to put music together for her. Still it she can sing so if you like her get the CD. The Pussycat Dolls is a bit of fluff but they actually have some cuts that I like so I give that recommendation. Best CDs I have lately though is Robin Thicke full of cuts, and Joe’s newest also full of cuts even though he is a dumbass that has never voted still his music is tight. (My God for real Joe are you for real? You a member of the People have never voted? Do you know how many of us died so that you could have the right?!!) I recommend them both. Finally for Hip Hop I got Nelly and TI’s latest. TI’s is a must have. His beats are da shit and almost all of his stuff kept my head bobbin…Nelly uhm not so much. He had some cuts but most of it was not da bizness. So there you have it my musical picks. Get them or not.
Well the economy has been going up and down which as been utterly terrifying. As if we need anything else to get worse. I am voting for Obama that is assured I am firmly convinced only he can get us out of this horrid mess. The world is in turmoil no doubt. This economic crisis has only been fueling more chaos. I fear a rise of racism. Infact I have seen it. In this country when things go bad, Jews, Our People, and the Latinos tend to be blamed. And we all know that the Bekes are insane when their pocket books seem to flip. Don’t believe me look at history.
Terry and I were accosted by some unsavory Beke who told us to go back to Africa. He was gross though and I told him to shut da fuck up and got him kicked off of the bus we were on still it was an unsettling experience. In this current political climate anything like that is harbinger of worse to come. Perhaps I over exaggerate but I know history and I have seen these things before.
So it appears that people have been saying unsavory things about me. I am what have I heard? A drug addict. Well I have a past and I have had issues with that. True but I know who and what I am and a drug addict is not that. I may be in recovery but I am no addict. Trumph beats me. Oh really. I don’t do a battered male. I’m too cute for it, and really if Trumph beat me do you think he would survive the night of the beating with a male such as I beside him? Right. Right. Finally the worst Kyon is a prostitute. Well I must be a horrible one because I am broke and have no clients. Really there are some things I have never done and will never do. That is one of them. I can barely stand being told what to do by the men I date and bed, let alone some man paying for the privilege of doing so! Ridiculous. Look if you are spreading untrue rumors about people stop it. ‘Cause it’s all fun in games until you get confronted. Isn’t it Steve? Right you fucking coward, if I had no honor I would tell in blogland how you hate me and spread such lies because you wanted to fuck me but I found you to be disgusting and give you nan the attention you want. I could tell them how on Sunday I confronted you after you spoke yet another lie to Javiav and got your face cracked so much that you fled the crescent in terror. But I won’t. Well I just did. I know I am an evil thing aren’t I? Well mes cheres that much aint changed.
I want to thank all of the many friends for being who they are and just loving me in spite of myself. I love you all and I want to thank you. I want my birthday gifts too!
Mike and Cliff
The Tony trinity
Carolina and Jorge
And finally to my beloved Paul Johnson who passed last week. Oh my poor sweet, fiercely proud, and independent Paul. I loved you long ago and have many sweet memories of dalliances, laughter, joy, tears, and just life. I’m smiling now at the memory of your face. How you were able to put up with such a silly slip of a boy is beyond me but you did. And you got see me full circle in my own, with my Bumpalump and my Trumph. Why is it always the ones who are good for this earth have to leave it while those who in my opinion are an utter waste of space cling to survival like tapeworms? It is not fair life is nor fair. Paul you touched me, you taught me things as a young man that I have always remembered and I will always cherish the times good and bad that I was allowed by the Bon Dieu to spend with you. I love you buddy, and I know you are in a much better place. Paix mon zami et adieu.
It’s Da Questions Dawg Da Questions
1. Do any of you know that we are to flashes away from going to war with Pakistan? Uhm aren’t they are allies. Yeah they may not be fighting the Taliban that well but does that mean that we have the right to violate their territory. Is the US trying to have the whole Islamic World inflamed at us anymore than they are over the debacle that is Iraq? You’d have thought Bush has figured this out by now but ahh bien we all know that fool doesn’t think unless Cheney fingers him like a puppet!
2. Why on earth is Thandie Newton going to play Condeleeza Ricei n the Bush Bio Pic? They should’ve picked someone else like Robin Givens. Thandie you are too good to play that Auntie Thomasina!!!
3. Why is everything always poisoned in China? Poisoned baby milk, poisoned cookies, poisoned toys, and now poisoned vaccines! If I lived in China I think I would starve to death. I’d be to scared shitless to eat or drink anything. Or play with a toy!
4. Isn’t it frightening that in these last days of the election race, that RACE is still the unspoken boogey scapegoat image? It is to me for the most obvious of reasons. We’ve seen this before it’s called Nazi Germany, I mean Young Turks Turkey, I mean Rwanda, I mean Yougoslavia, I mean well you fill in the blank. Don’t think it can’t happen here. Don’t ever get that comfortable.
5. For all my brothas and sistas don’t you just love being Black?
6. I wonder why in Seattle I am having all these people that I have turned down sexually suddenly saying the most crazy things about me? I mean I’m sorry but I don’t get turned on by being insulted and called a whore! Well I do sometimes but not in this instance.
7. Doesn’t is it ever surprise you how brainless men can be when their dick starts to stir? I know I’m included in this too. But seriously we males can do such stupid things for some ass or some nok, or some dick. Which would probably explain some of the stupid things some males do around me…. Sigh….
8. Why do some males have to be so damn difficult? Why do I always like the difficult ones? Am I crazy? Well I actually am but that’s beside the point! Well it is.
9. How come my friends tickle me in public every chance they get and laugh at the sounds I make? It is annoying and embarrasses me. Even if I secretly like them doing it.
Whew. Well wasn’t that a bit of tizzy? Had a lot to say and I feel better already. Do forgive me for staying away so long please. It’s embarrassing almost all of you posting and I sooo busy I can’t even post a hello? I know I will not do it again. Oh and hey I have a new You Tube Channel so check it out subscribe I plan to make it an extension of my blog soon so. I got some cool stuff on my page though so. Well I believe I should sign off I think I’ve given you quite a bit for now. I hope you like the pictures I’ve posted too, you know how I just do random things. Be blessed, show love and stay up guyz. Things aint great but they aint horrific either.
OH AND GET OUT AND VOTE NONE OF CAN ILL AFFORD TO BE APATHETICE AT THIS TIME! SO GET OUT AND VOTE! PAIX!!!!
It’s starting to rain again; everything’s gone now even the sun…. Aint that the truth. Seattle is Seattle again, the splendor of Summer’s kiss has left the face of the Emerald City and the skies above us all have become gray choked with the pervasive bone numbing wet chill that only we can understand. In short the weather is quite miserable enough without the ever persistent threat of frigid water falling upon us in sound spawned tempests. However it is just the weather and such wetness keeps the city in her green so I suppose I should not complain so much.
Well bonjou vas tous! How are all of you this day? Bien j’espere. I am at work and on pins and needles. My job that has been pretty chill for the most part has turned into the court of Henry the VIII thanks to this convulsing and floundering economy. They just laid off several people in my building in the past half hour including my sites director. It is in a word terrifying. Now is not the time to be out of work. The favor that I have enjoyed at this job now seems dreadfully uncertain and I’m not sure what to do. Perhaps begin looking though this of course is hardly the time with all I need to be doing to look for anything else. I like this job if for the benefits if nothing else. Pay aint that bad either but now… Aie sicre Jesu protégé mon travail s’il vous plait. ‘Cause I feel like they’re bringing the block for me. What a most frightening feeling in these uncertain times ‘cause I aint rich. In the meantime to focus on other less volatile things I am enjoying right now a cup of the vert and a doughnut while listening to Mary J Blige. Perhaps she could soothe my agitation between working wit my clients.
Last night I cooked for and dined with Carolina, Jorge, and Trumph and then we watched some hilariously stupid B Horror Movie called Hatchet. Hey if you get a chance check this flick out you will be cracking up. We laughed for a good while. Now I am back at court with my insane upper management changing their rules on whims and firing people like a mad tyrant on a gilded throne obsessed with his own vanity. I have never looked more forward to my days off as I do at this moment. That and there are spies everywhere in this place I have already had my own words spoken in confidence spit back at me however innocently they were deposited. I believe I know who it is and they will be dealt with in time. At any rate as you can see working in an economically stressed environment is not fun.
Still I am hopeful about everything. There is always room for hope and hope is sometimes the only commodity that one can have. The Lord will provide for it is in him that I am granted all things as is promised in his word. So have you been to my youtube page? Non, well you best visit. It you will like it if only for the different subscriptions on my page. Lots of cute males, lots of good ideas, and lots of fun stuff.
Well I’ve naught else to say I just needed to get these thoughts out for that is of course what my blog is for. To speak my mind and heart. Be blessed and remember guyz get out and vote. Even if its for that McCain Creature go ahead and vote.
Well that's all for now mes zamis be blessed! Bissous!
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
I know I know it's old but still this is something lovely...It's descirbing something that has been happening as of late that i can't say... Don't worry guys you will be hearing from me tomorrow... I'm okay and all will be explained... Be blessed and "die" in the arms of your love tonight.....Bissous.
Monday, October 13, 2008
So last night was my friend's birthday and I was pretty drunk and being plenty goofy as you can see enjoy guyz. OH and I know I been gone for awhile but I promise very vey soon this week you all will hear from me and get some photos too.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Salut Mes Zamis Sak Passe!
Enter my world for a second... What? Huh? Well yes there are Black People in the NW and yes we have a vibrant culture up here. I mean naw Seattle aint Atlanta or NYC or DC or Chicago or any other city with a huge Black Population, but it's my home and there are few places as beautiful... Not too mention in all of the NW Seattle and Tacoma have the highest Black Population. So come on enter the world of Kyon....Yon Yon Yon.... Sigh. I was trying to make an echo sound. Now look I I know I got some typos and things so be patient with me folkz.... Cause I get excited when I write... Okay there is no excuse 'cept that it's my page I do what I want! *smile*